Here we go….
Let me take you back to June 2017.
As I lay wide awake, in a hospital bed, just desperately wanting to get just 5 minutes of sleep, all I kept thinking was… “Where are you Lord? I feel so alone and I have felt so alone for quite some time now.” (Physically, no I wasn’t alone… I had my family there supporting me) I finally spoke those words aloud “WHERE ARE YOU LORD?”
I have never heard him more clearly in my life…..
“I AM the APLHA and the OMEGA….. I will never leave you or forsake you no matter how far you run”
I began bawling my eyes out, thanking him for reminding me that I am HIS and he is always there even when I can’t see it.
My precious Savior spoke to me! Me? Little ‘ol me… Who has been sick for a long time and couldn’t ever find an answer. Who had been praying,praying, and kept PRAYING. I kept feeling like I was praying but My Heavenly Father wasn’t listening.
My Heavenly Father was listening. He always bends down to listen even if we give him but a whisper. In the midst of the storm if we focus on him and not the storm around us, He is always there.
BE STILL AND KNOW THAT I AM GOD.
He tells us to be STILL, but in all my waiting and unanswered prayers I was all over the place. Worrying, crying, doubting, unhappy (lowest point in my life) and yes, even angry. (Forgive me Lord)
He answered my prayer a few months later, I found an amazing GOD SENT doctor, who prays and really cares about his patients… Who then sent me to St. Thomas where I was diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease. There, at St. Thomas, I looked over and seen a quote, “Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over it became a butterfly.” SO TRUE!
“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted, HE rescues those whose spirits are crushed.”
In his timing, always HIS perfect timing.
Hardships… some may say why does the Lord give us hardships if we Love him. For me I am so thankful He gave me this hardship… Because I have to lose my flesh self to become more like HIM! This hardship that I have endured, has strengthened my faith and helps me to turn to HIM above anything else. He KNOWS when we need to be brought to our knees because from there we must look UP!
There in that hospital bed, my life changed I can honestly say since that hospital stay I strive to seek him more and more. Are there days I struggle? Of course… He also laid it on my heart that night to start a blog and share his words and blessings. Let me just tell you, it has took me this long to decide to say OK Lord I will. Before I told him OK, I have tossed and turned at night about it. Almost whining to him like I would have my parents when I was younger.
“Lord, I don’t have the grammar or smarts to write a blog.”
“Lord, I don’t have the courage to bring myself to write a blog what am I supposed to write about?”
“Lord, are you sure this is what you want of me?”
“Lord, what will I even name this blog?”
“Lord, I am so afraid of what people may think!!!!!!!!!”
TIME AND TIME AGAIN, My Heavenly Father has kept encouraging me. Like my Daddy did, by holding my bicycle for me while I wobbled without training wheels, being there with just a gentle push of encouragement making me just have FAITH that I CAN DO IT. Or how my Momma would always whisper her sweet loving words when I wanted to do pageants but I was just so shy. I am so thankful they gave me encouragement, I am even more THANKFUL that my Heavenly Father has kept speaking to me and showing me that MY TALENTS are to GLORIFY HIM & TO PRAISE HIM.
So, I am letting My Heavenly Father help me be a vessel for HIM. And even if I only touch one persons life. I am SO thankful I got to share HIS word with that one person. Who knows, this blog might end up being for me also, to grow and know HIM more. Whatever the purpose, this is GODS plan, not my own.
I’m just a girl who grew up loving being around the cows with my Pa B, in the kitchen baking cakes with my Granny A, yard saleing with my Granny Z riding the lawn mower with my Pa W, riding in the log truck with my Daddy, shopping with my Momma, jamming/singing to the Smashing Pumpkins with my older Brother K, going wake-boarding at the lake with my older Brother M, playing rook with my older Sister J, fishing with and bossing around my baby Brother E, and fell in love with my Husband at 16 and still head over hills in love with him at the age of 28. I now have 3 sister in laws, 2 brother in laws, father in law, mother in law, and 11 nieces and nephews who are growing up way too fast.
Just look over my grammar folks! Haha.
HIDY everyone, WELCOME and THANK YOU for spending some of your time here.
GOD BLESS YOU! *Betsy*
P.s. As to why it is called Romans 8:31….Tune in soon 🙂